"But according to him, I'm beautiful, incredible..."

According to you
I'm stupid,
I'm useless,
I can't do anything right.
According to you
I'm difficult,
hard to please,
forever changing my mind.
I'm a mess in a dress,
Can't show up on time,
Even if it would save my life.
According to you. According to you.

But according to him
I'm beautiful,
Incredible,
he can't get me out of his head.
According to him
I'm funny,
Irresistible,
Everything he ever wanted.
Everything is opposite,
I don't feel like stopping it,
So baby tell me what I got to lose.
He's into me for everything I'm not,
According to you.

According to you
I'm boring,
I'm moody,
You can't take me any place.
According to you
I suck at telling jokes cause I always give it away.
I'm the girl with the worst attention span;
You're the boy who puts up with it.
According to you. According to you.

But according to him
I'm beautiful,
Incredible,
He can't get me out of his head.
According to him
I'm funny,
Irresistible,
Everything he ever wanted.
Everything is opposite,
I don't feel like stopping it,
So baby tell me what I got to lose.
He's into me for everything I'm not,
According to you.

I need to feel appreciated,
Like I'm not hated. oh-- no--.
Why can't you see me through his eyes?
It's too bad you're making me decide.

According to me
You're stupid,
You're useless,
You can't do anything right.
But according to him
I'm beautiful,
Incredible,
He can't get me out of his head.
According to him
I'm funny,
Irresistible,
Everything he ever wanted.
Everything is opposite,
I don't feel like stopping it,
Baby tell me what I got to lose.
He's into me for everything I'm not,
According to you.
According to you.

Ho Ho Ho.

The space below the mistletoe may be empty again this Christmas...

...but, the family & friends surrounding the Christmas tree are plentiful!

And for that, I am forever grateful.

The true reason for the season is also in my heart.

Happy Birthday Jesus - 'Tis a very merry CHRISTmas!

"The angel said unto them .... For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Savior,
which is Christ the Lord."
- Luke 2:11

"Glory to God in the highest, and on Earth peace, good will toward men."

- Luke 2:14

I Ain't No RoCkSt*R in the Kitchen.

I failed.

At the easiest dessert recipe known to man. One that I've made several times before...

Mom asked me to make 4 batches of these peanut butter/butterscotch bars with chocolate in the middle as part of the Annual Let's-Drop-Off-Baked-Goods-to-All-the-Neighbors-We-Don't-Talk-to-Other-Than-When-We-Drop-Off-the-Baked-Goods-Each-Christmas Day.

Many of you know I don't enjoy cooking or baking because a.) I'm the pickiest eater alive. b.) It always takes 5x as long to make the food than it does to actually eat it. c.) I'm impatient & get bored standing around doing it.

Anyway, I spent more than an hour preparing, making, & cleaning up after the krispie bars & looking at them afterwards, I thought they looked near perfection. I was proud of my accomplishment & for helping my mom.

Wrong, my friends.

Come to find out later while chatting with my mom, I had used flour instead of powdered sugar in the chocolate mix?!?! UNFRiGGiN'BELiEVABLE. How frustrating.

Oh for Blogsake!

There's a person that's very like me. Only, this person is about 8 years younger, about half my size [fun size of course!], has dark eyes, is more fashionable, has a six pack, can do kick-ass cheerleader outjumps, has a penis, & is openly gay. But, really...our semi-spastic & fun-loving personalities, our "couldn't say no" college involvement, our sense of humor, our sensitivity, our dating lives, our job interests, our liberalness [?], our passion for life, & now blog style is like he's my brotha from another motha!

He used to blog regularly when he spent a semester in London, but then Student Body President duties, Campus Activities Board duties, & the other hours of activities & academia called, so he disappeared. Well, his stories & his personality are SO blogable, that I've been buggin' him about writing again. I mean, he was a finalist for The Real World & our Homecoming King who received a tiara for goodness sakes! And he spent his birthday last weekend with some frat buddies on a pig farm shooting a rifle. LOL. If you knew him, you'd know that's so out of character & hilarious. ...I mean, he helped with the Miss Minnesota USA pageant a few weeks ago!

Well, blog buddies. He's back! And since I bugged him enough to write again, I wanted to do a little advertising for him.

Check out the next best & hottest reality TV star, Drew, @ Oh for Blogsake!

Hump Day HA!

Last week when I was leaving Sioux Falls on my way to Minnesota, I noticed some pranksters had rearranged this apartment complex's sign, SO FUNNY!

All I [Don't] Want for Christmas.

1.  Anything to do with the Twilight Series. So, I misjudged Harry Potter, but I'm not gonna cave on this one. I don't dig vampires. If a guy is gonna suck somethin', I don't want it to be my blood.

2. iPhone. Luke Wilson is a liar. AT&T service sucks. So I've heard... I'll stick to my Crackberry & BBMing my friends.

3. Stock in Wells Fargo. Their home mortgage department and I aren't friends & I wouldn't care if they became the next Microsoft; no investments will be made with my money.

4. Stuff. Like, anything that occupies space. I still live with my parents & thanks to #3, any space my body goes is all I've got.

5. Designer purse. I'm not on this Earth to be a walking status symbol, no matter how tomboyish or unfashionable I may appear. I hate carrying purses in the first place. Save your $100 per inch cash.

6. Kitchen gadgets. Unless it's a freaky fast Jimmy John's Slim #3 maker or actual human chef. Chef request - Ryan Reynolds por favor.

"

7. Socks. I don't like socks & 90% of the ones I do own have mysteriously lost their match. Chances are the ones you'd buy for me prolly would too. They're sneaky little biotches.

8. Fruit of any kind. My Christmas stocking is allergic.

9. Any wireless/electronic reading device. I want to feel the book in hand, turn the pages with my fingers, get to the middle where it perfectly falls open on each side, & keep it in my shelved book collection to trick future houseguests into believing I'm a really intelligent, well-read person.

10. A watch. I have wristclastrophobia & don't need a third ticking clock in addition to my computer & phone reminding me how little time is left in the day.

11. A Christmas form letter sharing your awesome vacation week in the tropical sun of Aruba. If it's not an invitation, save the stamp.

All I [do] want for Christmas...

...is for SOMEDAY...ANYBODY...OSAMA BiN LADEN [I won't tell!] to buy my house that's going on 16 months for sale!

Hit me up for a great Western Iowa deal y'all...

A Risk I Take.

Thanks for your comment Anonymous Lurker. I figured I'd respond in a post as I'm sure you're not the only one wondering about the "what ifs" of telling the world about my personal life.

A.L. said that my post could be found if you Googled "Sunday Six Senses", so if The Librarian was aware of Sunday Six Senses like I mentioned in the Surprise! post, then he could find my blog. Furthermore, the other guys I'm talking to could possibly run across it as well...

True. And I do think about that. I know that although I keep everything as anonymous as possible on here, that it's not an electric fence. Like I've said before, I have learned with this blog, that it really is a small world & have encountered a few times in which some mystery person has passed my blog onto their aqcuaintance connected to something or someone I talk about. It is for these reasons, that I try to keep it mostly positive, not man-bashing, & if a relationship doesn't work out, I don't go all crazy about it on here...just in case they do find it. 

The Librarian has read my blog & I knew that. After reading it all in one day, he said he no longer wanted read follow it because they were my personal thoughts, as well as he didn't want to be jealous about my other dates. He knows I am seeing other people & respects that.

The Coach doesn't know I blog.

Z knew that I blogged, but I'm pretty positive he has never read it, or I would have heard about it. Plus, it doesn't matter anymore, I'm pretty sure a romantic relationshp with us is over.

The Country Boy doesn't know I blog.

Next...

Bowel Movements + Communication = A No No.

I have learned that guys apparently find it completely acceptable to talk or text while doing their businASS with the loo.

Newsflash: I don't have any desire to here the plops, the grunts, or the trickles. Ever.

Not to mention, don't ya have to focus?!

The Ex used to call me while going to the bathroom...& admitted it while on the phone.

Z answered the phone once & rather than simply saying "Hey, I'll call ya back in a sec, I have to go to the bathroom," I hear my voice echo with background sound effects of...a waterfall perhaps? OMG, no. I was having a conversation with him on speaker phone while he pissed?!

Then last week, I texted The Librarian, who responded with a couple texts. ...one being, "I'm busy with a big project (potty)." LOL, WTF? I didn't need to know that, particularly the image I get when you say "big project".

So, to all of you proud poopin' & pissin' boys out there...what happens in the bathroom, please stays in the bathroom!

And for me, that's a can't stand.